Pretty Please

I'm currently dunking Tostitos Scoops! into a tin can of room temperature Fritos Brand Jalapeño Cheddar Flavored Cheese Dip while lying on the bed in my hotel room after a night out with Evan whom I grew up across the street from and Jenna whom I grew up on the same block as and it's surreal to think that twenty-plus years later we're still friends and also that I'm old enough to say that something in my life happened twenty-plus years ago.

Go slower, Existence.

Pretty please?

Yeah, He's Made It

I have a heterosexual pal named Evan who grew up across the street from me on Robinhood Drive in Muskegon, Michigan. Together we spent the bulk of our formative years rolling our own cigarettes out of coffee grinds and Post-It Notes which we'd smoke in a tent in his backyard. Evan lives in Seattle now and, as you'll see in a moment, is doing very well for himself.

Years Fall at My Feet, or Poetry Happened

We were waiting for a table to open up at The London Plane in Pioneer Square this morning, Evan, Grace, Laura and I, when it started to rain. During our search for cover we ducked into an old bookshop called Arundel which is where I found this beautiful and heartbreaking poem taped to a wall in the back. The poem is called The Letter and a man by the name of Ron Ellison wrote it.

How can I

put years on a sheet of paper?

As I grow older

years fall at my feet

     like autumn leaves.

They surround me

brightly colored



How many have fallen

     since I've seen you?

I will bend down

and count them.

Two Things I Now Know About Seattle

Recreational marijuana use is fully legal in Seattle and all over town there are shops that sell it, which are two facts that I did not know before landing here today.

In unrelated news, I am currently experiencing a lowered reaction time and some light sensory distortion in addition to feeling quite desperately in need of Fritos and a 32-ounce Airheads Xtremes Rainbow Berry Slurpee.