H Takes Manhattan

My sister caught my five-year-old nephew stuffing legos and a blanket into his backpack this afternoon, the teepee from his playroom rolled up on the floor next to him, and the following conversation ensued.

Kelly: What are you doing?

Harrison: Packing.

Kelly: I can see that. Where are you going?

Harrison: New York.

Kelly: How come?

Harrison: To see the beautiful lights.

Kelly: And what’s the teepee for?

Harrison: I don’t want to pay for a hotel.

Something tells me that kid will do just fine in the Big Apple.

Elton John Lives

We were mixing whites and yolks for a mid-afternoon batch of scrambled eggs today, Sid and I, when he confided in me his latest musical leanings.

Sid: I have a new favorite decade of music.

Me: Oh yeah? Which?

Sid: The 70s.

Me: That’s a good one. Who are some of your favorite artists so far?

Sid: Umm, Fleet Macwood, Van Morris, Elton John.

Me: You know he’s playing the Chase Center in September.

Sid: Really? I figured he was dead.

My Niece Is a Damn Dirty Cheat, or a Two-Year-Old’s Guide to Beating an Adult at a Popular Children’s Game

We were playing hide-and-go-seek before school yesterday morning, my two-year-old niece Ella Rose and I, when, following my discovery of her giggling, pajama-ed frame tucked oh-so-sloppily into a comically well-lit corner of her parents’ bedroom, the following verbal exchange occurred.

Me: I found you!

Two-Year-Old Niece Ella: No.

Me: Yes I did.

Two-Year-Old Niece Ella: No.

Me: My eyes are literally looking directly at you in this very moment.

Two-Year-Old Niece Ella: No.

Me: Yeah they are.

Two-Year-Old Niece Ella: No.

Me: You’re cheating right now.

Two-Year-Old Niece Ella: No.

Me: Yes you are! You’re cheating and lying!

Two-Year-Old Niece Ella: No.

Me: Fine! Forget it! I don’t even care! You win! Are you happy?

Two-Year-Old Niece Ella (smiling): Wanna play again?