A Quick Story

I taught my ten-month-old nephew Harrison how to press the home button on my iPhone when I was back in Michigan for Christmas last month. We sat on the bed in my parents' guest room one morning and practiced for quite a long time and after a while he was able to extend his pointer finger, press it against the home button and make the screen light up all by himself. We were having a blast, Harrison and I, pushing the home button and drooling and becoming best friends forever when my sister Kelly burst into the room and yelled at me because she'd read on the Internet once that babies face a high risk of cancer from cell phones, so Harrison and I stopped playing with the iPhone and moved on to something else, the blender probably, and now I have to find another way to make him love me the most, but whatever, that's beside the point.

As I mentioned last week, Kelly's mother-in-law passed away and so Kelly, Chris and Harrison traveled to Arizona earlier this week for the funeral. At the service Chris' sister Natalie was in the middle of giving the eulogy and everybody was in tears except for Harrison who was bored and getting antsy and kinda whiney and so the person sitting next to my sister thought he'd distract Harrison by handing him an iPhone to play with. With the phone in hand Harrison immediately cocked his index finger and honed in on the home button, except instead of pressing it and letting it go he pressed it and held it down which activated Siri who must have picked up some of the words from Natalie's eulogy because she said, in her signature sexy robot monotone, "Sorry, I didn't get that." Then there was a moment of silence and everybody, including Natalie who had stopped mid-eulogy, looked at Harrison who was still holding the phone and started laughing. After a minute or so, Natalie regained her composure and said, "I think we all needed that."

After the service quite a few people approached my sister to comment on the Siri incident and she was more than happy to blame me every single time.