To be a member of my family is to be an expert in the art of FaceTime.
So often do we utilize the mobile videoconferencing application as a means of spending time with one another in spite of the fact that we inhabit five different cities in four different states that my young nephews, Cole and Peyton, have come to regard it as yet another way of goofing off with their far-flung aunts and uncles.
Cole: Let's play a game, Uncle Corey!
Peyton: Yeah! Let's play a game, Uncle Corey!
Me: Okay. Guess what flavor this is.
Me (taking a bite): I'm sorry, but you're both wrong. It's blood.
Cole: Ew, Uncle Corey! That's nasty!
Peyton: Yeah! That's nasty, Uncle Corey!
Me: On the contrary, boys, it's quite tasty. Okay, what flavor do you think this is?
Cole: I think it's booger!
Peyton: Yeah! It's booger!
Me (taking a bite): Actually, it's apple. And you're both disgusting.
Cole: No, you're disgusting, Uncle Corey!
Peyton: Yeah, Uncle Corey! You're disgusting!
Me: Fair enough. Alright, try to guess what flavor this is.
Peyton: No! Blue raspberry!
Me (taking a bite): Nope. It's Smurf poop.
Cole: Gross, Uncle Corey!
Peyton: Smurf poop? That's totally gross, Uncle Corey!
Me: It's pretty delicious, to be honest. In fact, I should send you both a box of Smurf poop for Christmas.
Cole: Gross! No way!
Peyton: I want a box of Smurf poop for Christmas!
Cole: You would, Peyton.
Peyton: No, you would, Cole!
Me: Actually, I would.
Cole: Yeah, Uncle Corey would! He's gross!
Peyton: Yeah, he's gross!
And if, for whatever reason, we can't think of anything to play, my nephews, both of whom are growing up far faster than I care to admit, never seem to tire of making small talk and silly faces.
For every pixel of which I am grateful.