Haikus For Autumn

White comedian Michael Ian Black ("Wet Hot American Summer," "Ed," "Michael and Michael Have Issues") tweeted the following haiku about autumn yesterday afternoon:

Because I enjoy the art of haiku nearly as much as I enjoy hearing little kids swear, I booted up my Twitter account earlier this day and fired off a few fall-related micro-poems of my own.
Satisfied with my poetic output, I was hovering my mouse cursor over the "Sign Out" button when another tweet from Mr. Black, this time a retweet from one of his followers, appeared on my screen. 
Before I could finish reading it, however, another autumn-themed poem popped up. 
Followed by another. 
And another.
And another.
From all across the Twitterverse followers of Michael Ian Black were filling my feed with 17-syllable morsels of hilarity. In fact, so clever were these haikus that I thought to myself, "I should pick the best ones and compile a "top-five" list for my web log."

So I did.

Have joy.

Top Five Haikus For Autumn That My Mom Would Never Hang On The Fridge

Five.

Four.

Three.

Two.

One.

I consider it important to note that I do not condone binge drinking, candy tampering or grave robbing.
Oh, or beastiality.